Romans 12.9-16 Relationships

Let love be without hypocrisy. ...Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor; ...contributing to the needs of the saints, practicing hospitality. ...Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. Be of the same mind toward one another; do not be haughty in mind, but associate with the lowly. Do not be wise in your own estimation.Romans 12:9-16 NASB

Starting in Romans 12.9, we are presented with a series of instructions for how to live a Christian life.

We will spend a few days within these verses, examining the the themes that are presented.

The various themes are:

• Relationships within the church
• Righteousness
• Service to God
• Devotion to God
• Forgiveness

The first of these themes that we are presented with involves relationships. There happen to be more than twice as many references to relationships than any other theme in this passage.

When it comes to love you can't "fake it 'til you make it". It is either sincere, or it is false. It is better to be honest with someone than to feign affection. That said, we are commanded to love one another. Jesus said, “This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you." [John 15:12]

You may say, "But I can't just choose to love someone. Especially if I don't see anything in them to love." But I say, "Yes you can." Love is a choice, not some Hollywood drama. Think of love as a verb. It is something that you do. Remember, Jesus wouldn't have commanded it if it wasn't possible.

Perhaps you don't feel the emotion of affection for someone. You can still show brotherly love in your attitude by giving preference to others first, before yourself. If you see that someone has a need that you can fill, then fill it.

When something good happens to another, don't act jealous and cruel, but rejoice with them. Conversely, if something bad happens, don't gloat or say "It's about time they got theirs". Instead show empathy with them.

Verse 16 says, "Be of the same mind toward one another." This does not mean that we are supposed to think the same thing. We are being told to regard people the same regardless of their station in life. "Do not be haughty in mind, but associate with the lowly." The millionaire is not better than the pauper. Neither is the pauper more noble than the millionaire. God has a place for each, and we are to treat them with equal respect.

And do not think of yourself as "The Wise One". In other words, don't be unteachable. Accept the wisdom of others, and be willing to learn from others. There is more wisdom in listening than there is in speaking.

These acts of love will likely lead you to true affection. But it starts with a choice, followed by an action.